A Question of Romance

Valentine’s Day celebrates love and romance, which is what we want to do this month. Whenever my husband teaches on the topic of romance, a question he encourages men to ask their wives is: Do you feel more like a mother or a wife? CJ’s goal with this question is to help husbands discover whether or not they are making their marriage a priority, even over raising their children. 

Come to think of it, this is a useful question (slightly reworded) that we wives should ask ourselves: Do I act more like a mother or a wife? Which is my greater priority – mothering my children or being my husband’s helper, lover, and best friend? Now, with this question, I am not denying the importance of a mother’s role. Motherhood is exceptionally important. However, the Bible makes it clear that, after our relationship with God, our relationship with our husband is to be our highest priority. In fact, one of the most loving things we can do for our children is to prize our husbands.

Now, if you are like me, this question can be both helpful and discouraging. I find it helpful to see more clearly how I can improve in the wife department, and yet discouraging to recognize how far short I come from where I should be. Yet, seeing my deficiencies propels me to Christ. I am freshly reminded of my need for grace and mercy.

That is why Hebrews 4:16 was my morning meditation: “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Let’s receive God’s mercy and find grace to prize our husbands above all others today.