When I used to edit the church bulletin, certain mischevious staff members took great delight in “planting” mistakes for me to catch. For that reason, I particularly enjoyed the following list of bulletin bloopers. It’s been circulating for a couple of years now, so you may have read these already. And granted, several are a little corny. But really, some of these just have to make you smile.
1. Ushers will eat latecomers.
2. Today the pastor will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing, “Break Forth into Joy!”
3. Miss Charlene Mason sang, “I Will Not Pass This Way Again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
4. Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It is a good chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
5. Next Sunday is the family hay ride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome. Everyone come for a fun time.
6. Easter Sunday, we will have a 9:30 worship service. The 11:00 will be hell as usual.
7. Tonight’s sermon – “What is hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
8. Thursday night – Potluck supper – prayer & medication to follow.
9. Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.
10. For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
May the gospel, the truth that: “Christ died for the ungodly” (Rom. 5:6) bring you joy all weekend long. Courtship stories return Monday. Bye for now!
Carolyn, Nicole, Kristin, and Janelle