Oct 24

Thinking Good About Him

2008 at 6:08 pm   |   by Carolyn Mahaney Filed under Marriage | Communication | Conflict Resolution

As wives, we frequently face situations where we are tempted to think harsh and critical thoughts about our husbands. Sometimes we are more inclined to concentrate on what our husbands are doing wrong than what they are doing right. We are more aware of their deficiencies than areas where they excel. But if we submit to these temptations they will only dampen any desire to do them good.

In her book Love Has a Price Tag, Elisabeth Elliot includes some very good counsel from her husband for wives:

“A wife, if she is very generous, may allow that her husband lives up to perhaps eighty percent of her expectations. There is always the other twenty percent that she would like to change, and she may chip away at it for the whole of their married life without reducing it by very much. She may, on the other hand, simply decide to enjoy the eighty percent, and both of them will be happy.”

The apostle Paul understood the influence of people’s thoughts and feelings on their behavior. He exhorted the Philippians in this way: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worth of praise, think about these things” (Phil 4:8).

As we choose to focus on our husbands’ many commendable qualities—to enjoy the “eighty percent”, we’ll be amazed. We’ll grow in our eagerness to encourage, serve and love them—to do them good all our days.